Thursday, February 10, 2011
Landon Grew Wings!
Yesterday, Landon grew his wings and became an angel. Landon was 23 days old. We received a phone call yesterday morning as I posted in the last post for urgent prayers needed. They had put Landon on maximum support literally because they had nothing else they could resort to. It broke my heart to see my sweet little baby laying there helplessly trying to fight with everything he had. They tried switching him back to the conventional ventilator when his O2 sats were in the 60s and they went up to around 75ish but only for a very few short minutes. They dropped drastically into the 50s so they switched him back to the oscillator. He didn't really improve. Dr. Dykes told us then there was nothing else she could do for him. This really broke my heart into a million little pieces that I was going to lose my son. I think this is every mother's nightmare and worst fear. He then started going down in the 40s then 30s and we knew it was getting time for him to go home. They turned the monitors off so we couldn't see them. Daddy held his son for the first and last time alive. I held him after then Pops and then he had passed away in Pop's arms with maximum support. He was just so ill he couldn't fight anymore. At least he's not suffering anymore and has a new perfect body that he will never hurt in again. Mimi held her grandson for the first time after he had passed. We had a photographer come in to do pictures with us and baby Landon. We miss baby Landon so very much. I can honestly say that they really did everything they could possibly do to save my little fighter. It was just his time to go. Thomas and I did sign for them to do a partial autopsy of his chest and abdomen for us to have closure. To answer questions like would he have made it whether he had the surgery or not? If he had enough lung? Or if they just missed something during the process of everything? Thomas and I just couldn't live NOT knowing what was really going on in there. I just can't express the appreciation Thomas and I have for each and every person that prayed for Landon and us or that sent us words of encouragement or just thought of us through out the day. Landon is now our guardian angel that is happy and living pain free. Mommy and Daddy will always love you sweet angel. You will always have our hearts and our love. May God Bless you all!!